Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Bad Moms Movie Review

    So about 2 months ago some ladies in my “Mom group” suggested we get together to see Bad Moms opening night. Usually when we have a mom’s night out there is an ok turn out. By ok I mean anywhere between 7 and 10 moms maybe. This time there was an RSVP in our Facebook group for somewhere around 40 and 34 ended up showing up for the movie! It was amazing!

   Now imagine a movie about “Bad moms” playing in a theatre FULL of actual self-proclaimed bad moms… It was rowdy to say the least!

   So basically the movie is about Mila Kunis. She makes some new bad ass mom friends that have one thing in common. They’re tired of… well… Momming. I don’t know if that’s a word yet but dammit it needs to be. Each of them are in different relationship stages of life which I mean aren’t we all?!

   So they basically go up against another group of moms lead by Christina Applegate. These are the moms that make it hard for the rest of us. They’re the judgy moms that can do no wrong. I know you know a few just like them.

    The movie was absolutely hilarious. It’s full of raunchy jokes, horrible language, lots of alcohol and women sticking together. So it’s basically a bunch of my favorite things. No matter what type of mom you are you’re guaranteed to see yourself in at least one of the moms in this movie. I was with a really big group of women and every one of us was able to relate to the ups and downs of being a mom and this movie did a good job of showing just how much of a shitfest motherhood really is.

   It’s not just being a mom that can be trying at times but being a mom around other moms isn’t always fun. Some moms haven’t grown up from their days of bullying on the playground and they’re quick to point out what you’re doing wrong with your kids compared to them. Bad Moms is the perfect movie to make you feel good about your parenting skills. The moral of the movie? No mom is perfect and that’s ok. So go grab all of your mom friends and mom frenemies and go see the movie. I promise you’ll like it. If not…. Well I told you I wasn’t a movie reviewer.

   Oh fun fact… after I posted the picture of us moms on my Instagram the producer of Bad Moms left me 2 comments and followed me. Uh yeah it pretty much made my day!

Sunday, July 31, 2016

New Beginnings or Why I've Been Avoiding My Blog

   When it comes to this little blog of mine I can come across as a real flake. I used to post every week and now it’s been months since I’ve posted anything. Believe it or not I think about it every single day. I think about all of the things I’d like to post I just don’t have the chance to. I’d love to post DIYs, recipes and all of the fun things I do with my kids but I can’t. Some days aren’t that great and I just don’t have it in me to pretend. Don’t get me wrong my life isn’t shitty. I just have shitty days. After a lot of thought I feel like those are the exact things I need to be writing about. I figure this blog if anything can be cathartic for me. To help get me through those real parenting days. Those real marriage days. Those days when I don’t feel like a person at all but a machine that gets up first thing in the morning and breaks up kids fight and cleans up behind a sick dog. A machine that takes care of 7 kids and a husband who can be as challenging as all of those 7 kids combined. A machine that gets up before everyone else in the morning just to enjoy a cup of coffee by herself but ends up drinking it cold because no matter how early she gets up the kids can sense her peace and have to wake up early too. Those are the things I want need to write about so I can get it off my chest and don’t self-destruct from holding it all in. I know damn well there are a lot of moms out there that feel the same way I do and they just need to know that they’re not alone. Hell I need to know I’m not alone. So I’m going to stop hiding and avoiding my blog. I’m going to stop not writing just because I don’t have anything great going on. I’m going to write for the sake of writing and keeping it real. If I happen to throw in some DIYs, recipes and cute pics of my kids then that will just be a plus. Here’s to new beginnings.

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

When Your Kid Doesn't Want to Go to College

   I’m going to speak very candidly about this topic. I mean VERY candidly. Like I may swear in this post… a lot. If you’re easily offended now is the time we part ways and there will be no hurt feelings. This is a parenting blog and with parenting comes a lot of pissed off moments and many, many bottles of wine (sometimes something stronger).
   I’ve written about my daughter Dee before. I’ve talked about how proud I have been of her accomplishments in school and just how she’s an all-around good kid.
Dee graduates this year. Like less than 2 months. The rule in our home is once you graduate high school you’re allowed to continue living at home until you a) graduate college or b) have saved enough money and feel you are able to move out on your own (while still going to college). So basically work and go to school and you won’t hear mom and dad’s mouth.
   My husband always throws in option c) go into the military. There has never been talk of an option d). Why you ask? Because we didn’t think option d) was even an option. Option d) apparently is not going to college and working fast food. Ummm who the fuck wants option d)?!?! Apparently my kid does. The kid that graduates in June.
   Jay and I were not prepared for this. We never thought of what we would do if one of the kids didn’t want to go to college. I mean yeah we’ve got 1 maybe 2 we have always thought this would be an issue with but we thought we had time. WE THOUGHT WE HAD TIME!
   That time is upon us now. What to do. What to do. I thought it would have blown over. I’ve hollered and screamed and drank but nothing has seemed to work. Dee is convinced she needs to take time off of school. And do what? How much time? You work 1 maybe 2 days a week! How will you survive?!?! This is all of the shit that goes through my head and flows out of my mouth when I talk to her!

   Ya see the goal has always been for our kids to learn from our mistakes but this is some new shit. She has 2 parents that have gone to college. Hell I just started back this month but that’s a post for a different day.
   What do you do when you know your kid is making a mistake? I worked for years in education. I enrolled students just like her that wanted to “take time off”. It started out as just 1 year. That year turned to 2 then 3 and before they knew it they were on the phone with me telling me their fears about going back to school because they now were in their mid to late 20’s sometimes older and they had some legit fears about furthering their education. The only thing bigger than their fear was the regret they had for not going sooner.
   We still love her of course and we will work it out. How I do not know. After all she’s about to be 18 so we can’t force her to do what we want but I’m sure Jay and I will figure out a painless way to make her see things our way… lol

  Is your kid about to graduate? If so leave me a comment and brag all you want about your kids’ next move. I’d love to hear all about it. I promise I won’t be sitting here sulking into my glass of wine as I read your comments.

Photo credit: drpavloff via Visualhunt / CC BY-NC

Thursday, March 31, 2016

Things that Annoy Me about Working from Home

   Since having my youngest son in 2011 I found it easier to work from home. Back when I first started having kids working from home was not an option. So I worked a regular 9-5 for years while my kids went to daycare and home baby sitters. I felt really bad having to leave them. Especially on those days they just didn’t want to be away from me and I could hear their cries all the way to my car.

   Now that working from home is an option I’ve worked for a few different companies including U-Haul, HSN and my favorite Apple Tech Support. However, this isn’t a PSA on why you should work from home. Instead it’s about things that piss me off about working from home. More specifically, what other people do that piss me off.

   One that really bothers me is when people say “Working from home isn’t a real job.” Oh it’s a real job alright with a real pay check to pay these real bills! What people don’t know is when they’re calling their cable company, cell Phone Company etc. they’re talking to someone at their home in their pajamas. I don’t what makes people think a work from home job isn’t a real job. Do they think we live in the land of make believe making Monopoly money while we live next door to Daniel Tiger?

   To take it even further I’ve had people try to make plans with me and when I tell them I can’t because I have to work they tell me “Just don’t do it. Who’s gonna know?” Which then leads me to having to explain I have a supervisor and an actual team that would know if I didn’t log in for my scheduled shift. So yeah, lots of people would know. Including the good people over at the unemployment office.

   It’s not just outside people that have gotten on my last nerve when it comes to working from home. My kids seem to lose their minds at least 1 shift a week. In the beginning of me working from home they would knock on my door, turn the TV up to 135 and turn my Livingroom into kid’s Fight club! They’ve since outgrown that and know to leave mom alone when she’s working… most of the time.

   Besides the normal issues I’ve had some pretty crazy experiences and one of them is a kid that moved out of our neighborhood wanted to continue going to the same school. So his parents would pick him up from our house once the bus dropped them off. All of a sudden it started getting later and later until I went on my break one night and the boy was still at my house at 10pm!! There is a lot more to the story but you’ll have to read the full drama here.

   A lot has gone on since I’ve been a work at home mom but the wildest thing yet is my husband’s friend and his wife came over one night because he was having an asthma attack and they didn’t want to spend money on a co-pay so they came to our house to get a breathing treatment! Thankfully I had just started my break so I was able to get them in and out within my 15 minutes with no problem. I guess they did get faster (cheaper) service at my house than if they would have went to Urgent Care or the hospital.

   Bottom line is if you work from home don’t feel bad if people don’t get what you do. It’s not for them to understand but they should respect it. And if you’re someone that ha a friend or family member that works from home LEAVE THEM ALONE! A work at home job is just as stressful as having to leave the house to go to work. So don’t put any added BS on their shoulders.

If you’ve got a crazy work from home story or just want to vent leave a comment below.

Monday, March 21, 2016

Dear Mom with the 7 Kids

Dear mom with the seven kids,

    I saw your kids before I saw you at the dr’s office this morning. At first I thought there were two separate groups of kids then when you came over I realized they were all yours. Immediately I was captivated. We caught eyes and we smiled briefly then my kids were called back. You probably thought I was staring because you had such a big family. The truth is I was but not for all of the reasons you probably thought. I only had three of my kids with me this morning. As we went back for my kids to get their appointment started I couldn’t help but think you thought I was looking at you in a negative way. It was weighing on me.

   I know the looks you must get and the ignorant comments people make when they see you with all of your children. “Don’t you know what causes that?”, “Are they all yours?”, or my personal favorite “Are you going to have anymore?”. None of those questions came to my mind.

   As my kids were getting weighed and what not I saw you with your broad on the other side of the office getting weighed on the other scale. I was going to leave you alone but as I stood with my own kids I couldn’t help but hear you get frustrated with your own children. As they argued with one another, cried or told you how much they were ready to go home I did the only thing I knew to do…

   I came up to you and told you “I’ve never met anyone that has the same amount of kids as I do. God bless you.” And I gently patted your shoulder and gave you a smile. You smiled back and said “God bless you too.”

   Why did I take the time to speak? So you knew you weren’t in this alone. So you knew there were other crazy moms that have a lot of kids and want to lose their shit on a daily basis. I wanted you to know that I respect you and was not judging you. As moms we all need to feel like we are a part of a sisterhood. That regardless if we know one another or not we’re not alone and we’re not all judging.

Photo credit: mayeesherr. via / CC BY

Monday, March 14, 2016

7 Things To Do Before Having Kids

   I’ll start this by saying kids are great. There is nothing in the world like giving birth to another human being. The experience is a blessing and it’s life changing. I really do mean it is life changing. Once you become a parent you have another person that you are responsible for. Spontaneity no longer exists. I totally believe you can still do what ever you want once you have kids but you now have to plan everything around this little person. So if your goal is to have kids one day there are some things I highly recommend you do before that day comes.

Travel the world

You may already have a place in mind. Whether you want to go to a fancy Bed and Breakfast in Georgia, spend a week in an Italian villa or back pack across Europe you need to do it before you have kids. Imagine having to get passports for a whole family and then trying to sight see once you get to your destination. Not to mention the small fortune it would cost. Do it now then when you do have kids you’ll have awesome stories to tell.

Go to school

This may seem like a no brainer but a lot of people think it’s best to take time off after high school. It starts off as one year and turns in to many more. Then before you know it you’re trying to juggle school and kids while trying to keep your sanity. Go to school; get your education so you can secure a good future for not only yourself but your little ones as well.

Live alone

Many people get a roommate or two to save money and that is the smart thing to do when you’re first starting out on your own but then you go from a roommate to living with your significant other and next thing you know you’ve got a full blown family. Take the time to live by yourself. There is nothing like waking up in your own home with no one to answer to. Hell walking around naked is a pleasure that gets taken for granted. If you take some time for yourself to live alone you’ll be so glad you did once you have kids.

Appreciate your body

It’s ok to take care of yourself but don’t obsess with how you look right now. Chances are you are beautiful and just being extremely hard on yourself. Once you have kids and your body changes you’re going to wish you appreciated your post baby body and realize you didn’t look bad after all.

Save your money

Again, another no brainer but saving money is usually something people don’t think about until the baby is already on the way and at that point it gets kind of hard because the money is getting spent faster than it can be made. Having a baby is expensive, raising a kid costs even more so make sure you’re financially prepared so you can enjoy your new bundle of joy instead of being stressed out about how to take care of it. 

Get to know your spouse

Much like living by yourself is important it’s also important for you and your spouse to live alone before having kids so you can get to know one another. Spend time with just the two of you and develop a bond. Once baby comes along you really will only have each other to depend on and that bond will keep you together when things get stressful.

Have fun

It’s a lot harder to party and be hung over the next day when you have kids. So live your life and have fun. Life will still be fun once you have a family but it will be a different kind of fun. So party, get shit faced and then enjoy the silence as you suffer from a hang over the next day with no kids to bother you asking for breakfast.

These are just some of the things I think are important to do before having kids but I highly recommend you make your own list of goals and start checking them off your list. Don’t worry if you don’t get them all done. At least once you become a parent you’ll have an adorable little partner to tackle the rest of your list with.

Thursday, March 3, 2016

Even Superwoman Needs A Spa Day

   Being a mom of 7 kids, a wife and a business owner I often get called “Superwoman”. At first I’d always play coy and say “No I’m not Superwoman. I’m just doing what needs to be done.” I’ve heard it so much over the years I started to believe I did have super human powers. So much so that I’d feel down if I wasn’t able to complete a to-do list. I would feel like I can’t live up to other people’s expectations of me. I began to feel like only a mom, only a wife. I think I lost myself somewhere between motherhood and marriage.

   I decided to take a stand and take my life back. After all I was Samantha the person before I was “Mommy” or “Mrs. Minor”. I wanted to feel like myself again but didn’t want to let others down. Let me tell you that shit is hard. In trying to be Ms. Perfect. In trying to keep that Superwoman persona I didn’t realize what stress I was putting on myself. Mentally and physically. You see, no matter what you want to do your body will only allow you to do so much. You can’t supply everyone else’s needs when you’re not even meeting your own.

   Two weeks ago things started coming to a head. One of my children ended up in the hospital. The stress of that alone was enough to shake me to my core. While stressing over her condition and worrying about my other kids at home I could feel a change. Not a good one. Once we got her home I tried to get things back to normal but with a ton of doctor appointments and trying to catch up with work I started feeling bad. There is no other way to explain it. I just felt like shit.

   Come Saturday morning I got up (still feeling bad. Even worse actually) and did some cleaning and laundry. Finally I asked myself “What the hell am I doing?” Here I felt absolutely horrible and yet I’m pushing myself when I know damn well I shouldn’t be. My husband was at work and I had all of the kids settled watching tv and folding laundry. I told them I had to run errands I went straight to Urgent Care. Yes, I lied to my kids. I really didn’t want them to worry and I thought I’d be right back home.

   After being in Urgent Care for all of 15 minutes they called an ambulance for me to be transported to the hospital. My heart rate was 180 and every time it started to go down it went right back up. I called my husband and let him know what was going on. He met me at the hospital where they ran a ton of tests on me. The only thing they could tell me is that I have SVT Supra Ventricular Tachycardia. I’ve had it since I was 20 and it’s not really a big deal. I’ve learned to deal with the high heart rate once in a while but this time it was high and showing no signs of stabilizing.

   They ended up having to give me a medication to slow my heart rate as well as a sedative to calm me. The sedative did the trick until they told me I had to stay overnight for observations. I was so upset. I wanted to go home and spend my weekend with my kids and play games like we always do but I couldn’t. I had to stay to make sure I was alright so I can be around for many, many more years for them. So I could continue to be Superwoman.

   In the end I am good and healthy. The bottom line is I need to slow down and learn how to handle my stress. I think I really let the title “Superwoman” go to my head. There is nothing wrong with being an over achiever but you have to have balance. Without balance you end up stressed out and in the hospital. No matter how super human you feel you still need to just stop, take off your cape and take a break from time to time because yes, even Superwoman needs a spa day.