Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Why #RelationshipGoals Is Unhealthy

As I scan my social media time lines I’ve been seeing a new hashtag running rampant on the likes of Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. Apparently the new thing is #RelationshipGoals accompanied by a picture of an adorably cute couple doing cutsie things like cuddling, on a date holding hands or simply watching TV together. Do I think every couple should have relationship goals? Yes, I do. However, I do not think those goals need to be based off of a picture of another couple.

Behind the Scenes
There was a time that seemed like forever ago I would see other couples and think to myself “They are so adorable I would love a relationship like that.” Then over time the relationships that I wanted to emulate began to unravel at the seams. Everything we on the outside of these relationships are seeing only what these couples wanted us to see but on the inside there was infidelity, unhealthy amounts of fighting and many other things that were well hidden until it couldn’t be hidden anymore. I couldn’t believe I was Naïve enough to try and strive to be like someone else when they had problems of their own.

Social Media Will Make You Feel Bad
Nowadays with social media we get to see a glimpse into other people’s lives but again, it is only what they want us to see. While we scroll through Facebook and see all of the pictures of flowers or read the status updates about “How Bae is the best ever. I love him so much.” We oohh and ahh at them and silently wish for the love that they have but we don’t know what’s really going on. We don’t see that the flowers were sent because Bae didn’t come home last night. Too many times have I seen lovey dovey status updates from a couple I know but in real life I’ve seen first hand the turmoil of their relationship.

Make Your Own Goals
It’s all right to take certain aspects of a person’s life and want to adjust it to fit your life. For example a couple worked really hard to buy a new house or brand new cars. Or someone just celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary. Work towards those kind of goals but It’s important to sit down with your significant other and set achievable goals for your own relationship. Don’t try to mirror someone else’s relationship when all you’re really getting is little glimpses into their lives and not able to see the full picture. You could be striving for something that you might not really want.

 I want to be clear and say not all couples on social media are creating a façade but it’s always best to find who makes you happy and create your own  #RelationshipGoals.


  1. I love this! I hate seeing people use that saying when it comes to random pictures someone has made into a meme, or couples playing video games together. Why is that your ONLY relationship goal? What about creating a life together? Thank you for posting!

    1. That's what I can seem to figure out. Creating a life together and not trying to emulate someone else's relationship should be the goal.

  2. I can completely agree with this whole post. Me and my other half are not that lovey dovey public affection couple yet we have friends that do this with every relationship they have and it just falls apart. We've been together 8 years we know we're strong we don't need to show everyone for the sake of photos