Monday, February 1, 2016

My Life: 17 and Pregnant

   My oldest child Dee Dee graduates in June. She’ll be 18 years old in May. Some times I sit back and think about what my life was like at her age. I’ll tell you it was completely different! At the age of 17 I was living on my own. My mother not so politely asked me to leave home when I was 15. That is a story for another time. So at 17 I had my own apartment, was going to school, working at a telemarketing company run by what can only be described as functional cokeheads. How do I know that? Because I was pregnant by the son of one of the companies big wigs. I knew more about the people that ran that company than I wish I did. However, I’m getting off subject.

   So there I was a teen mom only there was no television show to be on to document my life. Or to glamourize my shortcomings. I was pretty sure my life was ruined but wasn’t ready to roll over and die. Even thou I didn’t lead the life of a normal teenage girl I was determined to try and do normal teenage shit. Like go to prom. So I did. 8 months pregnant I waddled my ass into the Wyndham hotel right into the ballroom. Now since I was pregnant and paying rent I didn’t have the money to buy a big poufy gown but I’m sure they didn’t make maternity gowns anyway. So I wore a black pantsuit I borrowed from a supervisor at work. Oh by the way, the whole “Normal teenage experience” thing was a group effort.

   I remember thinking once I was there how much I didn’t want to be there. I felt a little more at ease when I saw a girl in a beautiful dress more pregnant than I was being escorted out while she did her Lamaze breathing. At that moment I thought two things. 1. Glad I’m not going into labor in middle of prom (how freaking embarrassing) and 2. Where the hell did she get a dress from?!?!

   Two weeks later I graduated but my graduation day did not lack any drama. A mere few hours before I was to waddle across the stage just a week away from my due date I sat on the floor in my room crying on the phone to my mom. I remember the conversation having something to do with being the size of a hippo (I told you… drama) and not graduating because I had nothing to wear. My mom politely told me ok well then there is no sense in me going. I’ll talk to you later. I wasn’t offered any comfort or “you worked hard you deserve to do this”. I don’t know what I was expecting but the pep talk I feel that I should have gotten from her I gave myself.

   I picked my pregnant ass up off the floor, put on the pantsuit from prom and waddled across that stage. Then I had my baby girl the next week.

Me and baby when she was a baby.
    Life doesn’t always go the way you think it will but regardless of the hand that you’re dealt you can still make the most of any situation. I don’t want to call the things I’ve done in my life mistakes but they are experiences. I only hope that Dee learns from my experiences and chooses many different paths than I took. I hope the same for all of my children.

My big baby and I on our way to go see Madonna.

2 comments:

  1. What an amazing story.. you are one strong momma! Your children are blessed to have you!

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  2. I really love this post. I agree with the lady above. You are one strong momma and have such a beautiful daughter!

    www.sophieslittlesecrets.co.uk

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